The whole world is going ga-ga over the 3 R’s. If you are blinking at this new acronym or googling for 3 R’s, you are among those nerdy few who just watched BQC or an India V/s XYZ cricket match on television. Reduce, Reuse and Recycle: the 3 R’s propagated by the Cartoon Network’s green super-hero Captain Planet. Go Planet! Like the true ardent follower of Captain Planet and his fascinating battles with the polluters of the planet, I have decided to recycle some waste into something even more rubbish. Yes, I am recycling a post by a fellow blogger on this site. He is famous for his long and moronic posts which best serve as sleep inducers during those insomniac nights.
A few days back, I happened to be a part of one of those ‘interesting conversations’ that only beer can bring about. It goes something like this:
ABHI: : Beer se tangg aa gaya hoon yaar... Har baar wahi peete rehte hain.. Maine decide kar liya hai ab se beer nahi piyoonga
BHOLA: Kya baat kar di tune! Beer se kaise bore ho sakta hai koi ?
ABHI: : Ek hi cheez lagataar peete rahenge to bore nahi honge kya.. Soch agar koi bhi bore nahi hota beer se to kya hota.. Koi aur daaru banti hi nahi!
GANPAT: Sahi kaha... Beer me wo baat nahi rahi ab. Koi bhi cheez zyaada karo to bore hona hi hai... Chahe wo beer ho ya kuch aur.
ABHI: : Eggjactly.. Kuch naya peene ka mann hai ab.. Soch raha hoon whiskey peena chalu karoon..
BHOLA: Ye kya baat hui... Kal ko kahoge ki mujhse bore ho gaye... To kya humaara har weekend pe aise beer peena band ho jaayega?
GANPAT: Tune to abhi abhi beer peena chalu kiya hai.. Aur tujhe kaise pata ki mera pehla choice beer hi hai.. Main isiliye kam peene lag gaya hoon aajkal.. Jamta nahi hai...
ABHI: : Chalo isi baat pe ek bottoms up....
Gulp Gulp Gulp.... Have you noticed how we never ever need a reason for a bottoms up...
GANPAT: Bottoms up to kar liya par kis baat pe kiya wo samajh nahi aaya...
BHOLA: Chadd gayi tere ko... :D (another often repeated phrase)
Laughs all around which indicates that the conversation is going to get more animated and ‘deep’!
ABHI: : Par seriously... Kya koi apne doston ko bhi chhod deta hai jab bore hoga to?
GANPAT: Hmm.. Depend karta hai.. Doston ko nahi to kam se kam aise occasions ko to chhod sakta hai.. Tujhe kya lagta hai, aajkal Dev kyun nahi aata yahaan... Hamesha bulao to ‘Yaar, aaj busy hoon... Other plans hain...’ Saala...
BHOLA: Haan yaar.. Ye to socha hi nahi tha.. Par wo beech me aane lag gaya tha na fir se...
GANPAT: Haan.. Kuch time baad usko fir humaari yaad aati hai to wo aane lagta hai... Par fir kuch hafton baad bore ho jaata hai... Fir lapata...
ABHI: : Par wo seedha seedha kyun nahi kehta ki usko aana nahi hai.. Hum use force thode hi na karenge...
GANPAT: Par usme bhi fight hai...Agar usne seedha seedha keh diya to Bhola ko gussa aayega... Ki saala itni aukaad bad gayi uski wagera... Finally, usko pasand nahi hai to kyun aayega bhai? After all, har koi apni hi sochta hai...
BHOLA: Par dosti aur pyaar in sab se upar hai bhai... Ye dosti.... Hum naaaahiiiiiiii tooodeeeengeeeeee..... J
ABHI: : Todeeengeee dummm magaarrrr.. Tera saaaathh na chhodeeengeeee.....
GANPAT: Cool bhai log.. It shouldn’t look like we are drunk! But.. Coming to think of it, don’t we love someone just because of the way she makes you feel.... It is also selfish after all....
(Ever noticed how we switch to another language when we are drunk)
BHOLA: True.. But that won’t be the most flattering pickup line now, would it?
ABHI: : Of course... We all live by certain trust and norms. It makes things simpler. It is easier to say ‘I love you for what you are!’ and much more acceptable...
GANPAT: They are like unspoken facts or norms... And we humans are not the only ones, even the so called selfless pet is only showering love on us for food and affection...
ABHI: : So are we all just socially complex, personally motivated and individually responsible animals! That’s a scary thought!
Everyone silently sips their beer as they mull over this newly discovered idea....
Just then a phone rings.... Ganpat picks up the call.. It is from Dev!
GANPAT: Sau saal jeeyega bhai! Abhi: : Abhi: : teri hi baat chal rahi thi....
DEV: Kya baat hai! Peet peeche burai kar rahe the meri....
GANPAT: Jo bhi karenge saamne saamne karenge... Kisika darr thode hi na hai... :D
DEV: Kameenon... Beer mere bina hi pee liya lag raha hai....
GANPAT: Haan.. Tu to busy aadmi ho gaya hai ab!
DEV: Busy wusy kuch nahi... Main humaare thikaane ke baahar waale paanwaale pe sutta maar raha hoon... Aa jao baahar
GANPAT: Tu baahar hi hai! Aa rahe hain 2 min me....
An hour and 2 pitchers of beer later, the 4 friends are singing again with a passion that would have put Jai and Veeru to shame....
‘Yehhhhh dostiiiiiiii, Huuuummmmm nahiiiiiiiii todeeeengeeeeee........’
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